Sunday, November 18, 2012

Thankful Light

It's that time of year again where I subject friends and loved ones to my wonderings and babblings. 
Thanksgiving upon us makes me look inward, which hasn't been hard for me lately. The past few years have been the most difficult in my life and this last two, I barely survived...literally . As Dorothy said “there's no place like home” Looking inward, cleaning house, dredging up all the old treasures and sorting them out from the junk allows one to move forth and extend themselves outward. This Dear ones is my hearts desire.

Last night I saw a friend who I love so dearly and have since I first met her 21 years ago. When I told her how very much I always admired her, she said “there's a lot you don't know about me Jeannine”, like my love and admiration would change if I did. What she doesn't know is that nothing she's said or done would probably shock me, or change my heart for her, and the things I admire are the parts that rise above it all. When I connected with this friend, I saw HER, not her body, her actions, or any of the outer shell of her core. What I saw was a light that shone through all of that and lit up those around her, including me. She's beautiful.

I watched my friend raise her children, sometimes nearby, and sometimes in a way that was like being in a cosmic parallel play ( Peuoget, child development stuff. Playing along side each other, but not really interacting). I knew there were rough times, but I knew those children always felt loved. Because of that, they are incredible people today.

The challenges of these past few years have made me more grateful and aware than ever of family, friends, new people in my life and my own very soul, all of us shining our lights through the layers and lighting each other. Looking within and cleaning house has enabled me to see the treasures that are a part of my house, and you all are treasures. Your lights keep mine lit, and light it when it dims.

It would be all to easy to say how grateful I am for my children and Grandchildren who bring joy to my heart, but we all know this. I am ever so grateful, but my gratitude and thankfulness extends far into the Universe this year. Perhaps my heart will burst from it and my light will then shine down from above, who knows, but when I see your faces, or receive encouraging comments from you, it makes me shine with thankfulness to know you. I am thankful for those who have been drawn to my light as well as those who''s light has attracted me. Thankful for the ones who have held my hand through the rough times, without judgment... as the teeter toter tottered, as it always will. Thankful for the lights I see in new faces when I am invited into their “house” and look in, even just on the street, or in the market.

While marching through the streets of gratitude, I am always, always amazed at the children. So open to letting their lights shine. People say I'm a “teacher”, but the children have been the teachers for me. I try to facilitate their environments so that they can shine as far as they are able, but inevitably, they are the ones who light my heart. I'm truly thankful for the children and the children that I see in us all. Look within, put fear aside, and let your childlike light shine. Maybe I sound all new agey, tie dye hippie, but, hay, would you expect anything else?

Love, light... and just enough darkness to show the light,


Saturday, November 10, 2012

Hearts Of Nature

john Muir Trail Yosemite National Park

Natures Heartbeat

Nature’s heart beats over the Land with rhythm & cadence nourishing the souls of her Daughters & Sons

This time of dieing begs for honor, gracing the earth’s mossy bed with sacred permission

Permission to soak in the nourishment of our Mother and die in her arms

Surrender garments of light that were draped about supple Spring skin

Their colors reflecting those of wildflowers & clear streams

Out weary arms to be cloaked in blazing fire & heavy darkness for it is time

One more time put forth all that is left within and more, for the Universe to store

As the spider makes mad her spinning of webs, the Deer rut and the Squirrel scurries ~

so we must lay aside the sensibleness of the time of life & relinquish societal reason

Lay down in her arms, beat lulling & softening desires ~ her firm, but loving fingers caressing trusting souls

Pull snugly blankets of Fiery red, yellow and gold, fading to brown… prepare to nourish once again the earth ~

die with joy a certain death and come what may ~

bleak cold, warming once again ~
once again if again so blessed ~ Springs Life

~J~moonmango 10/7/2012

As inspired by Nature herself muses along the Jon Muir trail of a beautiful tree surrendering to the earth, bleeding sap like jewels & a moist fern still full of life flourishing in a crack in the rocks. We all have cracks after all. That’s how the light gets in
Trail to Half Dome

Trail to Mirror Lake
Long Way Home ~ Again

Been gone awhile, busy taking the long way home
Always seems so endless- miles of stretches of barren hot ground
Wildflowers & oasis’s spotted between
Sometimes now I get to wondering if I’ll ever make it home ~
If it’s worth the journey ~ why I go…
Each time I arrive, hungry, weary & battered, each time ~ I know

~J~moonmango 9/2012

Along Parker Creek East Side of Sierras
Hoping for food on the Half Dome Trail
Psycodellic Demon Shit

Shape of a wing, colored black & while with jagged distinct lines dividing the two colors.

The demon appeared as invited in the form of a huge dark grayish, blackish bird, the wing of black & white joining into its back. Slashing claws, which wanted to slash at my tendons, nerves & such reaching for the bone marrow. Long neck & opening beak twisting & tossing about threatening with dark vacant eyes, light deep within.

What do you want?” I asked as instructed to do. “your life. To kill you” the demon replied, staring directly into my eyes. Nuff said (Sam Elliot, various movies, but especially the one about the Forest Ranger) Pain subsiding…

What do you need from me?” “Your life” it said, seeming to mean as a gift, a sacrifice, not as a death by being killed thing. I understood.

Will you leave me alone if you get what you need?” The creature knashed, changed shape into a more compact beast, nastily throwing a tantrum, spewing out fire spit. “Tell me what you need & stop that fit” More knashing & spitting. “I’m not afraid of your tantrum, so get it out & get in on, what, tell me what!” More of the knashing & spitting (pain escalating) “Get down, now and tell me what I need to know!” I boomed. The creature writhed and subsided.

The caldron boiled with a jellyfish like flower thing pulsating in the middle with light off to the left. The demon drank from the caldron missing no bits of bone & flesh in the pot, changing into a more dragon like creature as it drank. As it finished the last bit, it began to glow partly from the male orb & partly from the jellyfish flower. It transformed into a dragonfly larve, then a full dragonfly with a glowing light in the middle.

“”Do I have an ally?” I called out wondering if the dragonfly was my ally. In swooped an eagle like, humming bird/bug eating type bird, snatching up the dragonfly as I laughed! “Will you be there to help me when I need it?” I cried out in question to the bird. As I spoke, the bird shat out the dragonfly, grinning as she shat, the crap turning psycodelic along with the bird, now glowing. A faint figure of a dragonfly could be seen in the psycodelic shit.

~J~moonmango On the journey to healing...a death to live 10/12

Is it that one door opens for every door that closes, or do we just become aware of the open door that we never bothered to knock until the one we were so comfortable walking through slammed shut?

~J~moonmango 9/12
Obsidian Dome
Procrastination Will Have To Wait

Coyote comes to me, dressed as Wolf
Spirit Guide the Great Horned Owl remains absent
Some imposter screeches all night into early morning
Telling me...what, telling me something, telling me to pay attention
pay what?

Blessings pour forth, yet no time for rest
Peace & joy well up like the baking soda volcanos in the sand
No matter, it's time to look and listen, be alert
Somethings going down....somethings heading this way
something, something...but what? Oh, I think I may know...I had forgotten

Like a child who played too long and forgot about the chore she was firmly told to do ~
I had forgotten. I thought I could rest, thought I could play
When my chore is done, that's what's going down, like a scolding
Like a warning before the consequence ~ Procrastination will have to wait...
I have work to be done. Brother Coyote came to warn me, screeching owl has been at me
Spirit guide has left me to what I was prompted to do ~awhile ago~

~J~moonmango 11/7/12

Much thanx to Mighty Mouse for saving the day once again...
Sun setting Half Dome Trail

Enter Spring, hearts full of love...